Sorry, Not Sorry!

It has come to my attention now that I’m in varsity and after I had fallen victim to the freshman 15 (or in my case the freshman undetermined) that my weight gain offends the people around me for some reason...  It is not enough that my clothes have turned against me and shrunk in disgust to the most unrealistic sizes, or that strangers give me dirty looks because I have the audacity to eat a freaking ice-cream cone and that I’m constantly comparing my body with every other girl in a crop top and Daisy Duke shorts...No, apparently I need to be reminded of the weight I've gained by every single adult in my life which is ironic because lets be brutally honest once you've passed the age of 40 the chances of you rocking a crop top and Daisy Dukes are slim to none so why is everyone and their grandmother commenting on my body? Do I relinquish my right to receiving the common decency of a white lie every once in a while simply because I am young and my metabolism should be on point or can you just say what you want because of all your apparent wisdom? Okay so I’m being a little mean and I apologize for that but I won’t apologize for gaining a few kilograms and having something to say about it.

People wonder why women resort to eating disorders in the pursuit of attaining a skinny frame when they know for a fact that women are constantly being bombarded with images of slim women parading around half naked in music videos and clothing adds (defeating the whole purpose of the add in the first place by the way) while women with regular curvy bodies are presented as the before in weight loss adds or the quirky funny best friend in romantic comedies, like being chubby automatically makes you a comedian. Come on now people we get exposed to these subjective beauty ideologies more than we can stomach the least you can do is keep your snide remarks and ‘helpful’ encouragements to yourselves. Telling me that I need to start making a plan ‘wink wink nudge nudge’ is not helpful it is bullying and offensive. What makes you think that I am not completely comfortable and happy with the way that I look? Your view on beauty is not automatically the same as mine. The only time ‘encouraging comments’ might be acceptable is if i’m on my way to becoming obese and there are health concerns associated with my weight. In this scenario I would gladly accept your concern but don’t feel the need to voice your opinion simply because my thighs are covered in cellulite and the sight of it burns your eyes, I would recommend that you simply divert your gaze and appreciate the clouds or something.

Would you find it offensive if I went up to you and suggested plastic surgery for your crooked nose or braces for your vampy teeth? Yes, of course you would so next time you feel inclined to comment on my thighs or tummy I’ll be morally obligated to punch you in the face and you’ll walk away knowing that you very much deserved it.

Women are not placed on this earth simply with the intention of becoming vessels for procreation or to look good on the arm of their male counterparts, we are not objects simply to be admired from a far. Women are complex creatures who have the ability to be powerful, successful and happy despite what they look like because when it comes down to it idealized beauty is often unattainable unless you resort to mutilating your body through various plastic surgeries because weight is not the only factor. You might be stick thin and still find yourself being attacked by various ideals of beauty. At the heart of it all you can never measure up to anyone’s expectations because there is such a huge variety of men and women who all have their own idea of beauty and unless you feel the need to change your look every day to please other people you will have to realize that you determine your own view on beauty and that your happiness and your opinion is the only one you should be listening to.

I might lose what I've gained this year or I might not. The point is that it is my decision. Being a specific size does not hinder your ability to reach your goals in life or to find love so why is everyone making it a priority? If it would make you happy go for it if you couldn't care less and you quite enjoy your new found curves embrace it and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. In conclusion I will leave you with these wise words by Mindy Kaling, a woman I have infinite love and respect for: